Here’s some movie reviews. These are the ticket stubs I found in my wallet:
How to Train your Dragon – 8/10
Greenberg – Undecided/10
Daybreakers – 5.7/10 – This movie really brassed my tacks. If they had left out a few stupid, illogical scene, it could have at least been a fun genre flick. If they would have done that and tightened up the plot a bit, it could have been a decent movie. But no – ridiculous, unnecessary action scenes, melodrama, and obvious, boring plot twists abound.
The Book of Eli – 6.5/10
UFC 115 – Wait, that’s not a movie!
Up in the Air – 6.3/10
The Imaginarium of Dr. Parnassus – 7.8/10 – I’ve been wanting to watch it again, and sometimes when that’s the case I upgrade the rating after the second viewing… we’ll see, Mr. Gilliam.
Kick-Ass – 7.3/10
Boondock Saints II – 4.3/10 – The first one was dumb but fun. This one is double the dumb and half the fun.
Get Him to the Greek – 6.9/10
Youth in Revolt – I don’t even remember what movie this is… off to IMdB. Okay, I got it. 6.5/10 – There were some funny bits, but all in all I don’t know why this movie has to exist.
It has a gimmick in the alternate personality thing, but that’s not terribly original, and they don’t play it that hard. Eh!
Shutter Island – 6.1/10 – (I repeat myself…) I don’t know why this movie needs to exist. The movie has neither a moral nor interesting character studies that I care about. If it was supposed to, they failed by giving us such dramatically over-the-scenarios that they couldn’t possibly mean anything to real human beings. Now that’s actually okay, in my opinion, if the filmmaking is especially well done. But Shutter Island fails at this too. Hang with me for a second on that… Any individual element of Shutter Island is successful. The acting, the set-design, the cinematography, etc. are all good. But doing a bunch of stuff technically well isn’t what I meant by “if the filmmaking is especially well done.” That’s just not enough (nor for that matter is it necessary). Rather the pieces should come together in a way that engages the audience in a significant way. That’s probably not very coherent; maybe I’ll rethink and rewrite it someday in the future.
Shrek 4 – 5/10
Cop Out – 7.9/10
Date Night – 5.8/10
Hot Tub Time Machine – 7.9/10
Robin Hood – 5.3/10 - Why, oh God, why? This movie was about liberty, and the evil of taxes. It had a middle-ages invasion at Normandy. It had really bad jokes. It had an extraordinarily boring Robin Hood. Russel Crowe is an insult to Douglas Fairbanks, Errol Flynn and Cary Elwes.
Lost Boys – 1,000,000/10
Macgruber – 3.7/10 – The only thing dumber than this movie is my inexplicable decision to see it. (Okay there were a couple fun moments, but it was not worth it.)
Prince of Persia – 5.9/10 – Something about large scale CG action sequences is an order of magnitude less exciting than a sequence with practical effects. I try hard to suspend disbelief, but I think our brains are just too smart for CG. Somehow bigger and more always wins out in Hollywood, and that requires computer-animated sand storms…….
Harry Brown – I left early so I won’t judge, but I was bored. I’ll try to watch it again someday in the distant future.
Death at a Funeral – 7.2/10 – I don’t know why I went to see this. The trailer looked distinctly unfunny, and I didn’t like the original that much. BUT it actually turned out a little bit charming, and funnier than I expected. It’s basically the same movie as the original, but I did like this one better. Still not brilliant, but I’d watch it if it came on USA.
The Ghost Writer – 8.9/10 – It’s nice to see a well-made, basic thriller that doesn’t collapse under the fat belly of Hollywood cliche.
Mother – I fell asleep for a lot of it. I didn’t like much of what I saw, but after hearing a positive review (I think from filmspotting.net) I’m going to rewatch it with an open mind.
Please Give – I just saw this, and I don’t know what to rate it yet. I liked a lot though. I need to watch it again. The movie has a strong theme in condemning our social focus on physical beauty, but that doesn’t seem to be what the movie is really about, nor what really drives the plot. Ebert makes this important insight about the thing: “The movie is about imperfect characters in a difficult world, who mostly do the best they can under the circumstances, but not always. Do you realize what a revolutionary approach that is for a movie these days?”
June 13th, 2010
Categories: I Crack Me Up . Author: Joe . Comments: 2 Comments
Anti-porn. I think there’s some good reasons to be anti-porn. My favorite is that supporting pornography supports an industry that reaps its rewards by taking advantage of what are often damaged people. (Many people in porn have a history of abuse – oversexualization – etc.)
I have heard quite a few references to Barney Miller in my lifetime. And I’ve always accepted them – that they made sense – but his week I saw the T.V. show for the first time, and I realized, all this time I never actually knew what Barney Miller was. Maybe I had a vague idea it had to do with T.V. and cops. But I didn’t know the show was actually called
Over the weekend I noticed something pretty exciting. Someone had left the Coke machine unlocked! Luckily I was working on VALENTINE’s DAY, and not a lot of people were around, so I could check to see if I could actually get into the machine. The answer is yes! Diet Cokes galore, all for me!